Don't be fooled Marriage is work!

Key to a Successful Marriage...

Marriage is a lifelong partnership between you, your spouse and God...

Understanding is key... “Through wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established; by knowledge the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches.” (Proverbs 24:3)

There is one thing to get married but it is another to remain married. Remaining in love and enjoying one another takes work, more work than many are willing to commit for more than 5years. We are forever growing and we should grow (if not there is something wrong) but that doesn't mean that our commitment has less weight. It's sad to hear many say "we are just growing apart or we don't love each other anymore". We don't just grow apart, that only happens when everything comes before our spouses and we don't spend adequate time nourishing our relationship. In all honesty what is truly being said is:' I'm too tired of dealing with this situation!". We must keep our hand in God's hand and also in our spouse hand as well… without doubt knowing we are in this together! 

We must begin to exercise our listening ability greater than our speaking ability. Most people can talk all day long but can you take the precious time to hear someone other than yourself? COMMUNICATION is KEY! Do you like being ignored??? Communication is more than just listening and it's more than just talking, it’s a combination of the two and a knowing when to do both.

We must communicate... if our brain didn't communicate with the rest of our body there will be sporadic movements, outburst and allot of symptoms of disconnection. We must have heart to heart time and conversation, this allows us to truly hear and relate to our spouses heart and concerns. This will help us seal up any cracks that were once exposed.

Where division tries to creep in that seed (thought, voice etc.) must be destroyed in its early stages... if not it grows like a cancer and just like cancer destroys vital organ, hurting other areas of your body the same occurs in your relationship with your spouse as well as your life! Anything!!! I will say it again ANYTHING that rises up against the knowledge of God must be cast down QUICKLY! The seed of discord and division can grow rapidly if left untouched and will build higher… subsequently and inadvertently causing the feeling of death in the relationship putting it into a life support comma state… leaving it in horrible need of resuscitation!

Jesus is the bread of life and his word is a lamp unto our feet and a light unto our path (Psalms 119:105). You must stop the lies that satan wants to feed you because they will make you weaker to the leadership of the Holy Spirit and give you much gusto in your flesh. Any relationship suffers when you feed off the lies of satan. Stop anyone that wants to feed you foolishness (be it through your mother, sister, friends etc.) Anytime someone has too much access to your ear that makes them too comfortable to open their mouth concerning your spouse, your mind, your spirit and your heart.  The Word of God says: Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks… anyone that will touch your relationship with negativity does not have you at heart and does not know the word of God for them self.  Stop negativity from having access to your heart, your mind and your spirit, they are too precious to God. With love and patients did Christ draw his people; we must follow these footsteps in our relationship with our spouses as well.

Start new ways to show your spouse their feeling are important to you.

¨       Please don't make the mistake of assuming they are over reacting in any way...

¨       Don’t cut them off while they are speaking...

¨       Don’t yell while speaking…

¨       Speak very calmly and when they are done speaking  then you can respond

¨       Check your body language.

 

Major keys in marriage:

To be Valued

To be Respected

To be Loved

To be Trusted

If these are not active or slightly active...make them active everyday!

Today's Key:

Use wisdom concerning your spouse...No emotional frenzies...don't be led by emotion...don't speak out of emotion!

Read Galatians 5:16-24 Ephesians 4:1-32

Let's make marriage work!

Key to a successful marriage...Marriage is a lifelong partnership between you, your spouse and God...

Understand that God has a plan for your saying...For better or for worst...for richer and for poorer...in sickness and in health, till death do us part. Sometimes you may need to remind yourself of your vow and commitment that was made to God and your spouse by reciting this to yourself. This goes to say” it is not all preachy cream every day but its good”.

                           

God had Hosea to marry a known whore... Joseph married a woman who was a virgin who also miraculously became impregnated (can you imagine what he was thinking) and planned to leave her! These marriages were both ordained by God for his purpose, taking a step back I'm sure these men thought to themselves 'God are you serious...are you sure? Look, I'm being ridiculed, gossiped about and being scrutinized! But God has a plan and his plan is all that matters.

Although your situation may not be as extreme as those, as we go through all these different situation it seem unheard of and we feel forsaken at times. Ps 9:10 And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, LORD, hast not forsaken them that seek thee.

There is not enough couples seeking God for direction together. It seems to me that there is a changing of the guards concerning this...one in and one out...one awake and one asleep. Remember the old movie "School dayz" What was the end??? WAKE UP!!! That's exactly what needs to happen. I remember maybe 9months ago I was asleep and angry at anyone trying to wake me up spiritually.My spouse (thank God for him) was getting the bitter end of the bat (Because a stick was to small) love, prayer and some people I never met help to shape my mind about my relationship with my husband. As I was pointing my fingers at him somehow they were all pointing back at me... My declaration to love him was not based upon what he did...I will love you until youuu, hmmm let me see? When I made that declaration It was to God first, That's where many are wrong in their minds today. Do it in obedience to God not based on how our spouse makes us feel...there is no until in true love because love cast out sin and therefore evil cannot stand!(1Corinthians 13: 1-13) 

Too many are living a lie...a presumption of their truth and that has to be cast down! We destroy every proud obstacle that keeps people from knowing God. We capture their rebellious thoughts and teach them to obey Christ. 2Corinthians. 10:5 in Jesus name!!!

Major Keys in Marriage:

Couples you must pray together!!! Come closer to God submitting your selves that you may walk out his instructions...The husband is the leader, teacher and the bread winner ( 1Tim5:8) and the wife is the vision seed holder helping to birth forth what is in her husband, she is submissive to her husband and can only do this through love. As the parents come together so the children will follow.

What are these senseless arguments? There is none perfect but our Father in heaven! Sisters get in position...Brothers get in position. I have found that confusion come when the wrong person is trying to wear the wrong shoes. Come into spiritual order! Until you do there will be havoc...We must be operating in God's Word that says” Let this mind be in you that is also in Christ Jesus” Philippians 2:5.

Our prayers are hindered when we lack respect for one another, we cannot speak badly concerning our spouse, The Word of God says: Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be (James 3:10).

Satan said...He said...She said... but what did God say?

Key to a successful marriage...Marriage is a life long partnership between you, your spouse and God...

Satan said...He said...She said... but what did God say?

The worst thing we can do is point blame! You know... we've all done it and we all know that it does nothing but irritate the situation even more. The word of God never told us to let our spouses know that they are wrong in our fleshly reactions, but in love and meekness will they be won over to a repentant heart...2 Timothy 2:25 Correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth.

Being a strong person is a knowing of who you are in God and that has all of nothing to do with being independent. I have found in women as they are so called... "independent" they are quick to tell someone "I don't need you" this word independent should never come up toward your spouse (check the meaning I'm sure you'll agree). A woman/man that is strong can be submissive and does not have to go word for word but makes the choice to deal with their spouse humbly. Their cries are unto the Lord in prayer concerning the issue or issues at hand and if and when time permits as the Holy Spirit leads us we can discuss our concerns with our spouse but there is no better correction than that of The Spirit of God... When they come and say " the Lord dealt with me" or you see the change, you're screaming in your spirit...Hallelujah!!!

God desires us to be humble but until we submit (TRULY SUBMIT) our heart to God more than not we are truly operating in a prideful and self righteous way. We need to understand that when we have purpose we are attacked in order to detour our minds from where it should be??? Marriage is a ministry and not off limits for attacks... usually your spouse can stir you up worse than anything or anyone else, so this is a great place for the enemy to start sowing seeds of discord. Cut satan off through prayer and fasting.

(SN: I began to look at my husband as my enemy because I was weak and vulnerable in my mind. I was being deceived so I was unwilling to fight! The warfare in my mind was much more prevalent than truth (God's word not my truth) and this almost destroyed my marriage... but I choose to use that season to encourage God's people to hold on and stand. The word of God is a healing agent and also it will wash you of past hurts)

1 Peter 3:7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

Ephesians 6:13 NLT Therefore, put on every piece of God's armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm.
Therefore, put on every piece of God's armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm.

Key: Do something you haven't done for your spouse since your early years of dating.